In Which Jenn Mourns Epcot’s Losses

World Showcase Players

What more can I say about Epcot?

What more can I possibly say about the hurt? The betrayal?

The Disneysphere has been in a tumult over the numerous closures announced in just the past few weeks. Many have said more and better on the subject, but here as some quickfire opinions.

The Backlot Tour. I liked the Backlot Tour a lot in 1998. It was still reasonably cute in 2012. I wish it was what it had been originally designed to be. But ultimately I’m okay with seeing what Disney will do with the space.

The Maelstrom. Oh, the Maelstrom. I am deeply saddened by the loss, of all things, of the narrator. Bring out your pitchforks, because I’m not a huge Frozen fan. I thought it was fine but nothing about it sparked my imagination. Still, I think even the hardcore fans might agree that Disney is spreading it around a little too enthusiastically. And I concur with all those who have pointed out that this is NOT what Epcot’s World Showcase is meant to showcase. All that being said, if I can wait and see what the Imagineers will do with stupid freaking bloody awful cliche dumb I-hate-that-movie Avatar, I can wait and see for this too.

Morockin.’ Whatevs.

The Fife and Drum Corps. Awwwwww. I liked it. I’m sad to see it go. But it wasn’t a staple or anything.

Off Kilter. WHAT? NO!

The World Showcase Players. WHAT????? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, here is the overarching reason why I think getting rid of Off Kilter and the Players is an extra-dumb mistake: THEY ARE INHERENTLY CHANGEABLE. You ride a dark ride enough times, you can play it in your head. Sure, riding it is better, but it’s going to be the same dark ride every time. And I love dark rides, and I say long live dark rides, but that’s why I didn’t get too outraged over, say, the removal of Snow White’s Adventures in favor of the new coaster. I’d ridden the Adventures many times, I knew how they went, and I was fine with seeing something new.

You CANNOT do this with Off Kilter (and I guess Morockin’ either but I was never into their show). I love Off Kilter; the band members were always funny and personable and put on a great and variable show.

But the PLAYERS, guys. The PLAYERS. I LOVE(D) THE WORLD SHOWCASE PLAYERS. Their shows were funny and interactive and never the same twice – there was a clear script but they improvised beautifully around their audience participants. They were sophisticated in the simplicity of their humor, not to mention literary and historical. Seriously, they were HILARIOUS and I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY’RE GONE. Why didn’t you hold them until the end of the year at least, Disney? WHY SO LITTLE NOTICE? WAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

Anyway. This weekend the Players and Off Kilter say goodbye. I’m so incredibly sad I missed it. And now, in tribute, I present:

  • A bunch of photos from that one time my then-boyfriend was pulled into the King Arthur show to play Sir Galahad. Ex or no ex, it remains a favorite WDW memory of mine.

  • A couple higher-res photos of the Players the last time I saw them, December 2013.

  • Two super crappy videos of the Players from like two years ago that I took on a really horrible phone. At least watch the Cyranose one. You’ll never see higher quality staggering. “And nobody loves you…………………………………………………….. like I do.” <- Favorite joke the Players ever told

  • Side note: I’m going to miss that guy in the blue shirt who was always there. Oh, and I never got to see their rendition of A Christmas Carol. DAMMIT.

  • And since we’re here and I’m going to miss them too, a similarly crappy Off Kilter video from the same year in which they perform “Irish Rover.” I plan to slap a bunch of OK into my running playlists in defiance.

It’s all gone.

In the immortal words of Marvin the Paranoid Android: Oh God I’m so DEPRESSED.

Epcot World Showcase PlayersEpcot World Showcase PlayersEpcot World Showcase PlayersEpcot World Showcase Players

Epcot World Showcase PlayersEpcot World Showcase PlayersEpcot World Showcase Players

A lot of smarter and more eloquent people have opinions on this subject – and they don’t always match. Here’s a listing of some of the more interesting posts I’ve read. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go cry in the bathroom for the foreseeable future.

Don’t forget, you can follow FRoA on Twitter @fairestrunofall and on Instagram @fairestrunofall. If you have any questions or thoughts, leave a comment or email fairestrunofall@gmail.comSee ya real soon!

4 Comments

  1. WHY EPCOT WHY?!?! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS DISNEY!?!?! I was sooooooo sad while I was there, I was practically dragged out of the park by my husband, kicking and screaming, and in denial that the next time I came back all would be gone!

    …ok, not all, BUT ENOUGH WOULD BE!

  2. I got to see The World Showcase Players (always one of my favorite things!) on Friday – you would never know they wouldn't be back the next day, missed Off Kilter and went on the Maelstrom twice. I AM SO SAD!!!!

Leave a Reply to Anonymous Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>