In Which Jenn Mourns Epcot’s Losses

What more can I say?

What more can I possibly say about the hurt? The betrayal?

The Disneysphere has been in a tumult over the numerous closures announced in just the past few weeks. Many have said more and better on the subject, but here as some quickfire opinions.

The Backlot Tour. I liked the Backlot Tour a lot in 1998. It was still reasonably cute in 2012. I wish it was what it had been originally designed to be. But ultimately I’m okay with seeing what Disney will do with the space.

The Maelstrom. Oh, the Maelstrom. I am deeply saddened by the loss, of all things, of the narrator. Bring out your pitchforks, because I’m not a huge Frozen fan. I thought it was fine but nothing about it sparked my imagination. Still, I think even the hardcore fans might agree that Disney is spreading it around a little too enthusiastically. And I concur with all those who have pointed out that this is NOT what Epcot’s World Showcase is meant to showcase. All that being said, if I can wait and see what the Imagineers will do with stupid freaking bloody awful cliche dumb I-hate-that-movie Avatar, I can wait and see for this too.

Morockin.’ Whatevs.

The Fife and Drum Corps. Awwwwww. I liked it. I’m sad to see it go. But it wasn’t a staple or anything.

Off Kilter. WHAT? NO!

The World Showcase Players. WHAT????? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, here is the overarching reason why I think getting rid of Off Kilter and the Players is an extra-dumb mistake: THEY ARE INHERENTLY CHANGEABLE. You ride a dark ride enough times, you can play it in your head. Sure, riding it is better, but it’s going to be the same dark ride every time. And I love dark rides, and I say long live dark rides, but that’s why I didn’t get too outraged over, say, the removal of Snow White’s Adventures in favor of the new coaster. I’d ridden the Adventures many times, I knew how they went, and I was fine with seeing something new.

You CANNOT do this with Off Kilter (and I guess Morockin’ either but I was never into their show). I love Off Kilter; the band members were always funny and personable and put on a great and variable show.

But the PLAYERS, guys. The PLAYERS. I LOVE(D) THE WORLD SHOWCASE PLAYERS. Their shows were funny and interactive and never the same twice – there was a clear script but they improvised beautifully around their audience participants. They were sophisticated in the simplicity of their humor, not to mention literary and historical. Seriously, they were HILARIOUS and I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY’RE GONE. Why didn’t you hold them until the end of the year at least, Disney? WHY SO LITTLE NOTICE? WAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

Anyway. This weekend the Players and Off Kilter say goodbye. I’m so incredibly sad I missed it. And now, in tribute, I present:

  • A bunch of photos from that one time my then-boyfriend was pulled into the King Arthur show to play Sir Galahad. Ex or no ex, it remains a favorite WDW memory of mine.
  • A couple higher-res photos of the Players the last time I saw them, December 2013.
  • Two super crappy videos of the Players from like two years ago that I took on a really horrible phone. At least watch the Cyranose one. You’ll never see higher quality staggering. “And nobody loves you…………………………………………………….. like I do.” <- Favorite joke the Players ever told
  • Side note: I’m going to miss that guy in the blue shirt who was always there. Oh, and I never got to see their rendition of A Christmas Carol. DAMMIT.
  • And since we’re here and I’m going to miss them too, a similarly crappy Off Kilter video from the same year in which they perform “Irish Rover.” I plan to slap a bunch of OK into my running playlists in defiance.

It’s all gone.

In the immortal words of Marvin the Paranoid Android: Oh God I’m so DEPRESSED.

A lot of smarter and more eloquent people have opinions on this subject – and they don’t always match. Here’s a listing of some of the more interesting posts I’ve read. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go cry in the bathroom for the foreseeable future.
Don’t forget, you can follow us on Twitter @fairestrunofall. To see how our training is going, check out Jenn’s dailymile here and Moon’s dailymile here. If you have any questions for us, leave a comment or email us at fairestrunofall@gmail.comSee ya real soon!

The Fairest Week In Review: 9/02

HELLO, FRIENDS! Just Jenn today, as Moon will be off gallivanting about the Continent for the remainder of the week. Whereas I, by contrast, am back from the beach and happy to… happy to… look, I kinda wish I was still at the beach, okay? But I’m here and I’m slowly getting over my post-break blues. How am I managing my recovery, you ask? Tune in later this week to find out! (Hint: upcoming WDW trips are involved.)

But can we just talk for a minute about some WDW things that are NOT assisting my recovery? No, I’m not talking about the Maelstrom Frozen overhaul; I’m withholding judgment on that one until I see it. No, I’m more distressed that Disney has decided to ax a bunch of World Showcase entertainment – including not only good ol’ Off Kilter but THE WORLD SHOWCASE PLAYERS. I mean, losing Off Kilter makes me sad because running to them makes me pretend-you’re-in-Epcot happy, but THE PLAYERS? You can’t get rid of them! They’re hilarious! GALAHAD AN APPOINTMENT TO TALK ABOUT THIS????


What else? Oh, right, running. Well, I DID run a little at the beach (more on that tomorrow). I also took a couple long walks on the shore that were awesome, swam in the ocean, and tried surfing a little. This last was pretty hilarious; I did a lot of talking to my board which consisted primarily of “NONONONONONONO” [SPLASH] [SPUTTER]. But I didn’t drown OR smack my head on my board OR get eaten by a shark, so: success!

No roundup this week as I barely touched my laptop all week. As always, if you see a post you think is up my alley, don’t hesitate to send it my way!

Don’t forget, you can follow us on Twitter @fairestrunofall. To see how our training is going, check out Jenn’s dailymile here and Moon’s dailymile here. If you have any questions for us, leave a comment or email us at fairestrunofall@gmail.comSee ya real soon!

In Which Jenn Discusses the “Fine, Don’t Come” Mentality

Story time!

Store 1: Once I was standing in the kitchenette of my former place of employment when two other employees came in. One mentioned something about Walt Disney World, and the other began a long rant about why he hated the place – the crowds, the lines, the prices: you know, the classics. And he seemed so PROUD of himself when he said it, like he had cracked some sort of code or something. The secret to happiness is to simply not go to Walt Disney World. Now go forth and enjoy life, good people!

I kept my mouth shut that time, as I generally do when dealing with people I don’t know terribly well, but it’s not the first time I’ve heard and overheard anti-WDW orations. In some cases where I feel I can, such as with my parents, I argue. Other times I just sidestep any confrontation with a gentle “Maybe you’re right, but I still love it.” Regardless, it kinda hurts my heart, you know? Maybe I shouldn’t care so much – it’s not like WDW is a matter of life or death as a rule – but I love being there so much that it stings to hear people declare its inferiority.

Story 2: At least it did, or at least stung a lot worse, until May of 2012. I had an annual pass that was expiring shortly and, when none of my friends had the time or inclination to go with me, I decided to take a solo trip, because why not?

On the second day, I was waiting around in Epcot for an Off Kilter performance when it started POURING rain. I asked a group nearby if I could share their umbrella’d bench, and not only did they say yes, they sort of adopted me for the evening. The Off Kilter show was canceled due to weather, so when the rain stopped shortly after (naturally) we all headed over to the UK pavilion for the British rock show, and then to Tutto Gusto for some wine and cheese and general awesomeness. It is so much easier to make friends at WDW!

The hero of this story is on the left. I think the waiter is into him.

Our conversation at Tutto Gusto, while varied, kept circling back to how much we loved WDW,  because what else are a bunch of childless adults with annual passes and Tables in Wonderland cards going to talk about? Which is when one of the guys said this:

“I used to be bothered when people said they didn’t like Walt Disney World. But now whenever someone tells me about how stupid they find it, I say: Fine. Don’t come. We don’t want you here. Because you’re the guy who’s standing in front of me in line for a beer. You’re the person in my way during the fireworks. You’re the one between me and my favorite ride. And you’re not even enjoying yourself? The more people like you who stay away, the less crowded it is for me!”

On the one hand, it feels a little harsh, no? WDW is supposed to be for everyone, supposed to be inclusive. Which is why, when given the chance, I will try to turn a non-believer into a WDW-lover every time. I will argue to the death for it; I will insist to the end that if only the hater would just come to the parks with me, I could show them what they’re missing.

But in those cases where I’m overhearing a stranger on the Metro talking about how much WDW sucks, I have to admit – it helps to think to myself, fine. Don’t come. We don’t want you there anyway.


Moon should be back next post. 🙂

Don’t forget, you can follow us on Twitter @fairestrunofall. To see how our training is going, check out Jenn’s dailymile here and Moon’s dailymile here. If you have any questions for us, leave a comment or email us at See ya real soon!