I’m not gonna lie to you guys – I’m not a Marvel person. I respect the franchise – my nerdy little Star Trek-loving, Disney-obsessing heart could hardly do otherwise – but it doesn’t do a ton for me. I don’t mind if someone puts a Marvel movie on, but I only see them in theaters when Pat asks me to go with him.
Which is how I wound up at a showing of Avengers: Endgame last weekend. First of all, can we talk about Puerto Rican movie theater prices? They are shockingly cheap. Admittedly our 12:35pm showing probably qualified for matinee prices, but still. We got two tickets, two sodas, and a candy bar for LESS THAN TWENTY DOLLARS. There are theaters in DC where $20 will barely get you a single ticket.
Anyway. So. There I was in the movie theater, eating my half of a Bueno bar and watching Endgame, a movie which elicited in me great feelings of neutrality and which is, by my conservative estimate, 87,000 years long. To keep myself entertained and continue to practice my Spanish, I took to reading the subtitles. Oh, right, I should mentioned – in Puerto Rico, Hollywood movies are run in English with Spanish subtitles.
So I was reading the subtitles, and I noticed that they didn’t always fully match up with the English dialogue. There were little things, word choices, but bigger things too. For example, at once point someone references visiting the Garden State. How the hell should Spanish-speaking audiences know what that is? The subtitles simply read “Nueva Jersey” instead.
But by far my favorite part of the movie came from just such a miss-match. I can’t remember who said it – Tony Stark, maybe? – but someone referred to the Hulk as Jolly Green. Evidently Green Giant doesn’t have a ton of cache in the Caribbean, because the subtitles instead said – wait for it – Wazowski. WAZOWSKI! Which is of course a reference to everyone’s favorite green star of Monsters Inc.
In conclusion, I made a meme about it for the people of the Caribbean. You’re welcome!