In Which Jenn Channels The Dread Pirate Roberts

Princess Bride

On Tuesday evening I ran seventeen miles. That’s not the part that will impress you. I mean, they weren’t very fast miles or anything. No, the part that will impress (horrify?) you is that I ran them on the treadmill.

I know, I know – we’ve already discussed the treadmill ad nauseum. I love it, you hate it, and never the twain shall meet. But a couple months ago I offered some treadmill-spicing advice that was pretty well received. Maybe I can make it happen again.

Because I have thought of another way I consistently beat the potential boredom of the treadmill. It’s nothing revolutionary; in fact, I didn’t even invent it. The Dread Pirate Roberts did.

You’ve got to take your mind away.


I can’t remember if the movie version of The Princess Bride mentions this – off the top of my head I want to say it doesn’t – but in the book (GREAT BOOK GO READ IT) there is more detail involved in Westley’s time in the Pit of Despair. He is not immediately strapped to the Machine, but tortured in other small ways, both physical and psychological. (Yes, in this conceit the treadmill is a torture device. Happy now?)

But Westley never feels any of these small tortures, because he, quote, takes his mind away. He is not merely thinking about other things. He is daydreaming SO HARD that he is transported to another place entirely.

And so, when my music isn’t pulling its distraction weight, I take my mind away. I’m not merely thinking about other things – I immerse myself wholly in a daydream. I only dedicate enough of my sense to running to keep myself moving properly. (Seriously, don’t worry; your body knows what it’s doing and will take care of you.) The rest of me is completely elsewhere. A really good daydream can propel me through countless miles.

Anyway, that’s another one of my treadmill-conquering tips. How about you? Do you take yourself away when you run? Where do you go?

Don’t forget, you can follow FRoA on Twitter @fairestrunofall and on Instagram @fairestrunofall. If you have any questions or thoughts, leave a comment or email fairestrunofall@gmail.comSee ya real soon!


  1. AS YOU WISH I will not badmouth the treadmill anymore but the PHANTOM TOLLBOOTH teaches us it's dangerous to NOT think. Perhaps we make imaginary Lands Beyond on the treadmill?

    also, 17 miles is just ridiculous.

  2. Don't worry, that's why I always pack a bottle of laughter/raucous sounds (depending on whether we're doing the movie or the book version).

    I think The Awful Dinn would be a good name for a dog.

    It's really not that bad, I swear.

  3. Seriously? 16 miles last week on a recovery week and now 17 miles this week? I'm lucky if I can do 17 miles for the week TOTAL!

    But more importantly, I appreciate all things relating to "The Princess Bride"…unfortunately my references are all movie based (and it is my favorite movie). My husband gave me the book to read when we first started dating, but once I found out that Fezzik dies in it, all desire to read it was gone 🙁

  4. Oh, no no no! Fezzik does NOT die in The Princess Bride. Fezzik does, SUPPOSEDLY, die in the teaser chapter of Buttercup's Baby that is included in some copies, but as that novel has never come to fruition and everyone knows that satire and trickery are the points of the books, that might not even be real. Give it another shot! 😀

  5. Alright, if you PROMISE he doesn't die, I will give it another shot…because the Princess Bride is the best thing ever 🙂

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